HNUM²

It’s way past time for number 7 in the greatly written and impressively thought out top 10.

In this episode, which starts as Tom Servo has become a real boy, the first black and white movie to be featured on the list is… featured.  It’s a movie full of excitement as  the world of gangsters and the world of shoe salesmen clash with unexpected results.  And who is to blame for it all?

First up, though… Well, after the initial host segment, is the short The Truck Farmer.  It’s the second edition so you know it’ll have scenes the studio thought too graphic for theatrical release.  It’s pretty informative.  Who would ever have thought that poorly paid migrant workers are happy to be working in hot, dirty environments?  And who would ever have thought that the vegetable race against time would be so exciting?  Not I, that’s for sure.  It was good seeing Killdozer pre-Clint Walker days, too.

Up next is the Penile Replacement Corporation motion picture,  I Accuse my Parents.   And Superior Court Pt IV: Citizens on Patrol, will succeed in proving one thing…  Accusing your parents is probably the second worse defense you could come up with.  Demonic possession probably the first.  So, you’re a rich kid, your parents throw money at you, you’re successful at school… And so they’re alcoholic, barely listen to you, spend no time with you.  If only “Emo” existed back the, he’d never have become involved with the mob.

The movie starts off with some pretty decent jokes.  Most involving alcoholic mother jokes.  Or nerdy kid jokes.  Or shoe jokes.  A young Al Bundy, Mrs Lush, Closet full of dead shoe salesmen, Tom singing along with the music… All great bits from the first 10 or so minutes.

The next stretch of the film is Jimmy trying to impress the first woman he meets.  I wish I had his lying skills when I was his age.  I’d have been knee deep in pussy.  Wait, that sounds really gross.  Balls deep in pussies.  I guess teenagers should learn that the girls have caught on  to the  “I love you” lie and start with the “My mother is great and me and my dad are like best pals” lies instead.  And  Joel and the bots lie via Jimmy a lot.  As over the top the better.  “I liberated France while you were dancing” one of the funniest.

As the episode continues, there’s plenty of observational and referential humor.  Kitty looking like she has a pig in a blanket on her head,  Kitty being “Torn from the thigh of Zeus”, “You can’t handle the truth”, “I lied”  Arnie style.

The running essay contest jokes are amusing and well timed, like the “Selling essays cheap” and the quickly following  “This is a message from the other kids in the essay contest” and “Mom, I won the get the crap kicked out of you contest” are three of the funniest.
Tom’s singing in several parts are also very funny.

Now it’s quote time…

“aslongasItalkreallyfastanddowhathesaysI’mgonnabeOK”
“I accuse her hair”
She’s drunk…”It’s funny”
Everyone calls me kitty “I don’t know why, my name is susan.”
“Quite a long line at the petty larceny window”
“What are you doing in a Cocteau film, boy.  Go home to your mother, that’s a good lad.”
“Message coming in”
“Bought to you by Boones Farm”






Host segment time…

From Servo’s heartbroken real nude boy to the reenactments (the Gypsy singing especially) via the psychoanalyzing of the bots, and later, Jimmy… Every segment is funny.  Crow probably has the best dad in the world.  The ’stache is a bit worrying, though.




That flashing light?  We’ve got “hitting the publish button’ sign.